On January 31, 2025, I was let go from the bookstore where I’d been working part-time since June 2024. I was devastated. I loved that little shop. But if I’m being totally honest, things had started getting weird back in December. By January, the writing was on the wall—and not in a fun, literary quote of the day kind of way.

I kept trying to convince myself it wasn’t happening. That I wasn’t being slowly pushed out. That this wasn’t another repeat of 2020, when I had to leave a job I’d held for five years under similar circumstances. But spoiler alert: I was absolutely being pushed out. And when I didn’t just quietly resign (because hi, I’m nothing if not loyal), she fired me. Via email. Blamed the economy. Classic.

Needless to say, I cried. A lot.

But after the ugly tears dried, something surprising bubbled up: relief. I missed being home. I missed my family. I missed my dogs (they’re terrible coworkers, but fantastic therapists). I was already juggling two virtual clients and staring down my daughter’s high school graduation and all the events leading up to it. Losing the bookstore job meant one less spinning plate and fewer chances of metaphorically dropping them all on my face.

I also felt very clearly led by God: Don’t go looking for another brick-and-mortar job. So, I didn’t.

Instead, I dove into building my own online bookstore. But…financially, I still needed one more client. So I started interviewing. A few opportunities popped up, but every time I got close, the door slammed shut. God was basically doing the spiritual equivalent of “nope.”

One interview in particular was so bad it had me questioning my entire existence. The guy was a complete jerk. After that, I stopped pushing and just decided to sit tight, keep following God’s lead, and try not to panic (too much).

Then last week, I got a message from a recruiter I’d talked to a few months back; she places practice managers for EOS Implementers (which just so happens to be my niche). She had a potential client for me. At first, I almost ignored her. I assumed it’d be another closed door. But then I figured, what’s one more interview?

So I went for it. The interview was on Monday, May 19. I was nervous, half-hoping the guy would cancel. But the second his face popped up on Zoom, all the nerves disappeared.

The call was supposed to be an hour. We talked for two. By the end, I told him it felt like we’d known each other forever. (No, I didn’t actually know him. He’s just that cool.)

The truth is, I’ve spent a lot of time lately angry, frustrated, and ugly-crying. Financially, yes, I needed a new client. But emotionally? I needed something to help fill the space that’s about to open up when my daughter heads off to college.

Even with running my bookstore and managing two social media accounts, my afternoons were starting to feel too quiet. And when I’m not working, my brain starts spiraling. First comes the anxiety, then the depression, then the “maybe I’ll just reorganize the fridge again” phase. Not ideal.

But now, I get it. If I’d still been working at that bookstore, I would’ve missed so many once in a lifetime moments during my daughter’s senior year. If I’d taken on a new client in the middle of that chaos, I probably would’ve crashed and burned.

The point is: we don’t have to understand what God is doing. Most of the time, we can’t. That’s why He just asks us to trust Him.

Since 2020, life has felt like a never-ending game of “what now?!” But I’ve learned that God is all I truly have and thankfully, He knows everything. The beginning, the end, the scenic detours, and even the potholes we don’t see coming.

So for now, I’m following the path in front of me. Because I’ve finally figured out that God doesn’t need my resume…just my trust.